The Hokies found a way to climb back in to the rankings by powering back to a #23 spot in the Coaches and AP polls. Granted its not something to brag about all around the FBS block, but as far as the ACC and other 2 loss teams are concerned its a great feat to have accomplished after losing two games in less than six days to start the season.

On a sunny Homecoming Saturday, the Hokies scored 49 points in the first half against Wake Forest to tie a one-half scoring record under Frank Beamer’s tenure. Defensively the Hokies let up a few 70+ yard plays which is isn’t comforting but not uncommon to the style of play for Wake Forest who employs the triple option. It hopefully will give some insight to the Hokies, who had a tough time against Georgia Tech last year when similar play-calling pushed the defense around the field.

(Have fun going to 49 kiddies)

The first quarter alone seemed to last as long as the 2002 Syracuse game and the second quarter ended when other 3:30 games were well in to their third quarter - but with VT scoring on all but one possession of the first half who was to complain? Even after the second strings went in during the third quarter the cameras caught Tyrod Taylor pleading with coaches for another shot -which he briefly received - in part settle a bet with Danny Coale that he could rush for more yards running on his hands than Tony Gregory would get in the forth quarter. Chris Hazley also continued his perfection at kicker since missing a couple in the first game of the year.

With Duke on tap next the Hokies need to take a deep breath and prepare for the daunting closing stretch which pits the Hokies against UNC, Georgia Tech, and Miami. If they keep on this pace they should be feeling confident of their ability to pick up more conference wins and continue to strive to make 2010 a season to be proud of despite coming out of the gate flat.So here’s to a celebration for crossing another one off the list. Let’s keep it going boys. Perhaps, Jim Grobe said it best when referring to the Hokies after losing to the team 52-21 “They’re hitting their stride and really playing good football now.”

Tyrod Taylor provided the Hokies with 288 yards of offense in the 45-21 win  over Central Michigan. He ran for 127 yards perhaps best highlighted by his 15 yard TD run in which Central Michigan players appeared to bounce off him. It was the sixth 100-yard rushing game of Tyrod’s VT career - meaning he now has more 100+ yard rushing games than Michael Vick… impressive.

Frustratingly, the team didn’t convert on a single third down - despite their ability to score 38 unanswered points - and a few too many long passes made it past the defense’s secondary. Such game notes are not the most reassuring when you consider the team is playing what may be the worst directional Michigan in the MAC. Still, it seemed like the team was playing more hungry this week as they continue to mold back to a lofty preseason-projected form. Even our Left Gaurd kept playing after he lost part of his finger in the game, which was floating around inside of his glove until trainers extracted it to sew it on after the third quarter.

Heading in to Homecoming weekend against Wake Forest let’s just keep working through the conference and hopefully toward crossing another one off the list.

Maybe we just like to come back from 17 point deficits. Down 17-0 it didn’t seem that such a comeback would represent the biggest comeback WIN for the Hokies under Beamer but it was - heck we came back on Boise State down the same score but then again we didn’t leave with the W there.

The running was great (Tyrod’s 71 yard sprint, Wilson’s 92 yard TD, and Evans’ 160 total yards some shining examples) but the Hokies defense gave up 500+ yards to the Wolfpack - almost twice what Alabama racked up against Florida later in the day - so there does need to be some quiet reflection for Bud Foster and friends.

Without looking back for regrets we can be excited to cross another one of the list. Even at #23 a ranked team is a ranked team and gets the Hokies one step closer to whatever it is a team hopes to achieve in a season that you lose to JMU.

With a non-conference breather next week the Hokies will look toward Homecoming against Wake Forest and crossing another one off the list…

As for now, I am watching Donovan McNabb play as the quarterback for the Redskins against the Eagles, who has Michael Vick behind center. Had you gone in to a coma 2 years ago and only awoken today October 3, 2010, THIS would be the most alarming and unexpected change that you would have to process.

…and 3. WIN an in-conference game. Boston College is to thank for crossing two more off the list.

The Eagles fell just inches short as time expired in the first half - it proved to be an accurate representation of the entire game for Boston College and it ensured the momentum would remain with the Hokies the rest of the day. 19-0 was the final score thanks to some good kicking by Chris Hazley and marked the first time the Eagles have failed to score a point in over a decade worth of games.

Now, BC quarterback David Shinskie won’t get the start against Notre Dameas a result of Saturday’s game. It seemed like an unfair punishment that doesn’t give Bud Foster and the defensive powers of Virginia Tech enough credit. The announcers for ACC Select television coverage didn’t feel that the blame was Shinskie’s alone, but they also commented on how great it was for VT fans to have Stinespring as an assistant coach so they were clearly off their fucking rocker, snorting cocaine whilst jamming to Tatum. Yes, Stinespring did learn the “Screen Pass” (a.k.a. button A play on Tecmo Bowl play selection screen) but I still found the effort uninspiring.

Really, it was a win in traditional Hokie fashion - some big plays, lots of running up the middle, an all-important game changing turnover, and normal uniforms. Perhaps it is the Top 10 team we were supposed to get 3 weeks ago… who knows, at least it allows us to cross off two more from the “To Do list”.

Here’s to next month, a new Chipotle, and a new beginning back in Blacksburg.

So step one is complete – the Hokies have a 1 in the win column three weeks in to the season. It didn’t come easy either, bouncing back from a 10-0 deficit the team finally came to life in the second half. The final score, though impressive and besting the oddsmakers who favored Tech by 20 still gives me concern simply because of the two teams we saw on the field – the first half squad and the second half squad.

Per usual the Hokies relied on a turnover and good adjustments in the second half, a victory for Bud Foster in response to an otherwise lackluster defensive showing in the first half. Granted the defense is learning here in the third week of the season but its unfortunate they are just now finding themselves when the team is unranked and scratching for legitimacy. We are all still scratching their heads at why Jim Weaver would schedule two games in 5 days, but excuses are getting harder to find and it was a welcome return to Hokie football we know in love.

And can we please never ever have a game exclusively broadcasted on ESPN3.com? I’d rather have Jefferson Pilot shooting the game with a Gameboy Camera then have to endure the scrub list announcers stagger through a disjointed steam of compressed video on my computer screen. I feel like I’m doing work when I watch a game with a mouse and keyboard in front of me, and given the Hokies past two games its been a job that Mike Rowe would even say “fuck this” to.

Stinespring still needs a pink slip too – don’t let 49 points convince you otherwise, the play calling in the second half was encouraging but not representative for the same old crap we can expect next week.  Remember that a lot of the drives were assisted by ECU’s penalties, Tyrods quick reaction when the pocket collapsed, and long backyard football bombs that seemed more risky than well calculated. Step two is winning a conference game. Here’s to crossing another off the list next week.

Has anyone taken a look over at BS’s page on Wikipedia recently!? Sarah H. did and passed it along… It is a beautiful piece of writing. Take a look:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bryan_Stinespring

And in case anyone changes the wiki content for lack of references, below is the page as of right now (Sept. 12, 2010) memorialized for your enjoyment:

“Stinespring has faced criticism from the fans[1] and players[2] for offensive output during his time as offensive coordinator, which compares poorly with that of his predecessors under Frank Beamer.[1] Stinespring is widely considered the worst offensive coordinator in all of college football and has been a ball and chain that the Hokies have had to drag around for years. At least ten times a game a play is called where you can actually hear the entire stadium say, “Really dude?” It is unknown why he is still employed but it has recently come to light that he has information about Frank Beamer that he has used to essentially blackmail Frank into keeping his job.

It has, however, recently come to light that Stinespring is in fact three babies standing on each others’ shoulders and wearing a trenchcoat. In light of this, is is remarkable that he/they can manage an offense at any level of college football.

Stinespring’s bad habit of not resigning in the face of his own overwhelming incompetence has made clear how little he cares for Virginia Tech. Stinespring may, in fact, be an agent of the University of Virginia. While some doubt this in the face of UVA’s continued inability to beat VT, the situation has given birth to the phrase “Even Bryan Stinespring can’t lose to UVA!”

Bryan Stinespring has replaced Maurice DeShazo as the most hated man in the history of Virginia Tech football.

Below are Virginia Tech’s offensive statistics during Stinespring’s time as offensive coordinator

…

[miserable stats from Stinespring’s tenure are then displayed]

…

Below are the reasons coach Frank Beamer has relentlessly cited for retaining Bryan Stinespring: [References listed]“

In less than one week the Hokies went from outside dark horse candidates for a BCS title game on the cusp of playing one of the most anticipated nationally televised and highly touted games in recent memory to suffering one of the worst loses in the history of Hokie football.

Who really knows why the stars aligned and gave us this horrific one-two shitshow start of a season. Perhaps my new Hokies shirt is the opposite of lucky (it will never be worn at a game again), perhaps we OVERused that third down gobble sound effect to a point that the mojo turned on us, or maybe we lost more talent than we realized, or maybe just maybe we have spent too many seasons under the old motto “we don’t rebuild, we reload” and we need some actual effort and coaching changes to harness the amazing talent we have on the field to get back to a winning program…. regardless we can’t fix the fact that going in to week 3 we still have a big ol’ zero in the win column.

So what then do you look forward to when your team, in under 5 days, goes from being an AP Top 10 team to one that may be lucky to field any votes in the polls come Monday? Well, restart, rebuild and take it one step at a time…

1. WIN a game
2. WIN a road game
3. WIN an in-conference game
4. WIN a game against a ranked opponent
5. BECOME bowl eligible
6. BECOME a ranked team
7. WIN any bowl game
8. MAKE the ACC Championship game
9. WIN the ACC Championship game
10. WIN a BCS Bowl game (Orange Bowl)

At this point I am looking forward to being able to cross off ANY of these as the season goes on, in fact it will be the only thing that keeps me going. Ideally I’d want to be able to cross off 8 or more come the end of the year but after this start I am counting each as a milestone.

One good thing has come from all of this — this fall has become a much less stressful, less anxiety filled, and more of a carefree season - its like worrying all year about getting a date to  prom and just deciding to burn the place down the night before instead. Now every game is simply a “win” and something we can be thankful to have on the books. No more cracked out Saturdays cheering for a team in front of us to fall, no more overstressed work weeks in which I try to balance sanity with anticipation and fear of what the weekend will hold, and no more talking trash constantly to anyone who cheers for a team other than VT…

Sniffle… sniffle… yep, fall is not going to be the same.

The Washington Post had a delightful sports section today, the front page had three things I was stoked to see… first Dibble is fired from the broadcast booth by the Nationals, secondly, Nyjer Morgan’s freak out brawl is highlighted with the man himself taunting the crowd as he exits the field, and lastly a cover piece on the Hokies, their stellar running game and potential to head to the BCS Championship game. And for good measure there’s even an upskirt shot in the upper left just to make sure we had some smut in there too.

Go ahead and click on the different articles in the image and learn more …

Do you feel that? Its that dormant addiction brewing in your soul, that anxious excitement that makes you feel queasy and parched, that feeling like you are sitting down in a soon-to-be-launched 150 MPH roller coaster called “Christmas Eve on Cocaine” — It is Hokie Football season.

And because of late, our team seems to want to get back on the wagon in grand either-were-fucked-or-we-fucking-rule fashion we decided to start things off with #3 Boise State at FedEx field…  “#3 Boise State at FedEx field”… That phrase  has almost no known equivalent of lunacy save for “fucking 9 albino whores with a flaming penis blade atop my dragon saddle.”

This is the biggest game in Boise State’s history - because it is the one game that all of the analysts have decided to accept as The Path to the promised land known as the BCS Championship game. Everyone knows how important this game is for shaping the rest of the season rankings (and potentially the post season format in years to come) and big conference schools are all biting their nails whispering “come on Hokies, come on” because they know that Boise can run the table and find themselves squared up against a program with 10x the financial support and 10x the asshole alumni behind them if they live up to their preseason #3 ranking in one week.

Sure, Boise State is a good team and they have a lot of players back. They tend to do well at the end of the season when they one to throw one last fist in the face of the small-conference naysayers. I am sure its easy inspiration for the coaching staff, the old David vs. Goliath, show ‘em what you got, they called your mother a whore routine. But this game is different, now they have the target, and the Hokies are the ones on the attack.

Metaphorically speaking, Boise State has played a game of Asshole with his College Football buddies during the ENTIRE keg party. Boise State was always handing over 2’s and forgetting to call out “last card” - relegated to Vice President at best, but usually just the beer bitch - and they now have their golden chance. They finally have all the 2’s and high royals and they can’t wait to show everyone what they are made of. Well you know what, that’s usually when you get stuck with too many card in your hand and everyone else plays around you.

Here’s to what comes in one week and to the worst sports metaphor ever blogged - Let’s … Go … Hokies!

So we already know that USC had to vacate it’s 2004 Orange Bowl Championship game win because of NCAA rules violations and that was the year that Virginia Tech opened up against USC at FedEx field. So then if that USC team didn’t really “exist” then just how different would have our 2004 season have been?

1. First of all we would have turned the FedEx home opener in to a shit slinging barn burner. With no team to compete against for 60 minutes there wouldn’t have been a need for any keys at all, just start chanting “stick it in” from your own 20 and start setting records.

2. With an 11-1 record the Hokies would have played in the National Championship game. Losing to only NC State on what would go down as one of Brandon Pace’s only bad games, the Hokies may have squeaked by to play Oklahoma in the National Championship and we all know OU only loses the big games so by that logic the Hokies would be crowned national champions.

3. An outpouring of pride in the Commonwealth of Virginia resulting from the Hokies first National Championship would motivate the young voters of the state, turning the state for the democrats in the 2004 presidential election thus causing a run off in which John Kerry would be elected the 44th President of the United States.

4. With Dick Cheney out of the White House, Halliburton would have far less power and would not secure Off-Shore Drilling subcontracts in the Gulf of Mexico. You guessed it, crisis avoided, the gulf is safe and the world is at peace and everyone is a Hokies fan.

So now that we know what happens when you erase USC from the 2004 season we can all look back wishing that the world knew then what it knows now. The 2004 Hokie National Championship team and creation of 100% clean renewable energy were so close to being a reality, mankind just wasn’t ready for Utopia.