Where was I this weekend? Well I can tell you it wasn’t at Virginia Tech’s Spring Game… No, it was in a place far more red neck than that: Talladega Superspeedway. Talladega, Alabama is a region of the country so poor and so shitkicker that they can’t even afford a proper strip club. That small omission from an otherwise regular southern landscape didn’t stop myself and four other educated men from driving twelve hours to join 200,000 “race fans” in a weekend full of loud cars, free smokless tabacco products, Nickleback playlists, and LSU tailgating tents.

I can’t really say I know what I witnessed the entire weekend, although some of it has been burned in to the back of my retinas never to be spoke of again, but I have been told that at this point I am a fully accreddited NASCAR patron. And likewise I’m not cetain what happens to me next, but I think I am supposed to get a pair of truck balls for my car and find me a woman with a 40 pound vagina bulge.

I am going to spend some time evaluating my life.

Could Michael Vick be another reality TV hit? MV7 himself thinks so. Apparently his $600,000 book deal is more of a television deal. More specifically a television series which will follow Vick as tries to put his life back together in the wake of a dog fighting scandal that cost him everything.Filming is expected to start on July 20, and will follow Vick throughout his day as he seeks to “make amends for his past,” financially and morally.  The series is expecting to cover his attempts to reenter the NFL as well as all the hilarity and hijinks sure to ensue once he starts work at a $10-an-hour construction job. I can’t wait for the first episode when Vick can’t get his cinder blocks to lay right so he electrocutes them, smashes them at the wall, and then drowns the pieces in water.

Producers are shopping the series to shitty cable outlets like Spike TV and Animal Planet and it has been rumored that Vick stands to make more than 600k for his participation in the series… he expects to land the “real” money off his newly discovered pop culture image.

Virginia Tech football has its first scrimmage today and it may be the start of one of the most hyped seasons for the team in a long time. The team had a great season last year and should be building on the talent and experience this season. Last year, amid low expectations in what could have very easily been written off as a “rebuilding season” the Hokies had their fifth straight 10-win season, won a second straight ACC Championship and finally inked a “W” in a BCS Bowl at the expense of Cincinnati.

No need to talk about Bud Foster and the defense - I think that train is going to continue tearing down the tracks. As for offensive concerns, sure we lose Macho Harris and some linebackers, among other starters, but we also get to say goodbye to that prick Sean Glennon, and so too goes the trail of tears story that every broadcaster seemed compelled to retell every time he was sidelined. Sure on paper Glennon looked like an alright guy but anyone who actually witnessed his entire body of work would think otherwise. Now we have two freshman QB’s to start building hype and/or hate around and we also have Greg Boone on-tap to take an occasional snap for Tyrod if necessary… and I love that guy (for now). Although, I don’t like that we don’t have a kicker lined up yet because nothing is more frustrating than seeing a game lost on something like the kicking game (coughing through Carter Warley).

Let’s see what happens in the next few weeks from Camp Beamer and look toward what will hopefully be another great season (even if we still have Stinespring).

It’s opening day night for Major League Baseball and I can’t wait to get out to Nationals Ballpark. Prediction: Nats will win more games than the Orioles.

Michael Vick’s lawyer stated in a Virginia Bankruptcy Court that the former NFL quarterback and dog connoisseur will be taking a job in construction. Vick is expected to be released from the penitentiary in May and given the recession he believes his best bet for earning some green would be lifting bricks and lumber for an hourly wage of just over $10 - a far cry from his 10-year, $140 million contract with the Falcons.

Vick’s lawyer said in court that his client was in “great shape and could once again command millions of dollars if he returns to football.” Many of the creditors who were present at the hearing stated they are relying on the belief that Vick will return to football where he can quickly earn the money he still owes on a number of bad investments and other debt which resulted from his fall from grace and 23 month prison term. However, that would still require a vote of approval from NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell.

Vick’s NFL recovery package plan was rejected by the judge presiding over his bankruptcy hearing. Ironically, the judge said Vick needed something more “concrete” in line his future earnings. If Vick doesn’t make it back to an NFL team this season and decides to pass on the upstart UFL football league (flopping kicking-off later this year) he won’t have to rely solely on the construction gig for income… Vick has agreed to participate in a Lifetime MTV Animal Planet Spice Channel television documentary about his life, netting him $600,000. The lawyer also hinted that Vick may have a book deal in the works as well. No word on what the book would be about or if it would contain only pictures or a combination of 2-syllable words paired with pictures.

Though it appears that Vick, under his bulging suit and lavender dress shirt, has maintained his physical form over the past 2 years behind bars, it is difficult to say whether he has retained his football talent to a major league level. To help encourage teams that may be interested but nonetheless hesitant in signing Vick out of concerns that he wasn’t staying in top shape during his prison term, his lawyer released this picture to the media: